Seeing myself as God sees me

I really blew it this morning.

My youngest son's school occasionally provides the opportunity to "buy" an out-of-uniform day by giving students the option of donating $5 toward the big 6th grade trip to Washington DC.  So I set the informational form and a five-dollar bill on the kitchen counter.

In the mere minutes after that action, as my sweet little 2nd grader fumbled around trying to get his things ready for school, he suddenly discovered that the $5 was missing. 

"Well I'm not giving you another $5," I snapped. "You'll have to figure it out yourself." And I walked away.

Seriously?  What kind of mom does that?!

Wow.  Where does that kind of stuff even come from?  My mom wasn't like that. At. All.  She was always so patient and gracious.  (At least that's what I remember.)

I mean, I wasn't even feeling angry at him.  And then it dawns on me:  that's how I would speak to myself.  You dummy. How could you lose $5? You better find it.

So God nudges me.  Sara, that kind of self talk is a lie.  You need to replace those antagonistic thoughts about yourself with the truth of what I think about you.

Negative self talk has plagued me much of my life.  And it never really occurred to me until today that when I allow myself to mentally speak those destructive thoughts to myself, I am reinforcing a lie from the devil about who I am.

Here's the truth about what God says about me (and you):

I am an image bearer of God—made in His image!
[Genesis 1:27]

God knit me together, and I am wonderfully made!
[Psalm 139:13-14]

I am God's masterpiece!  (Not a dummy!)
[Ephesians 2:10]

I am God's child!
[John 1:12]

I am loved!
[John 3:15, John 15:9, John 17:23]

I am forgiven!
[Romans 5:8, Hebrews 9:28, Hebrews 10:12]

God sees me as being without fault—because of Jesus!
[Colossians 1:22, Hebrews 10:17]

I am so thankful that not only am I forgiven for my unkind words to my son, but also that God doesn't think I'm a dummy, or worthless, or any other negative thing my mind can conjure up.  I am God's child—lovingly and thoughtfully created by Him for His good purposes!  (And the same goes for you!)

Incidentally, I asked my son to forgive me (he graciously did) and the I asked for a "do-over" (which he gladly performed with me).  I'm thankful for that too. :)

Where's the joy?

Peter asked Jesus, "What about him, Lord?"  Jesus replied, "What is that to you? As for you, follow Me."  (John 21:21-22)

Lately I've found myself muttering, "Lord, how am I supposed to be joyful in these circumstances? with these disappointing elements? and these joy-sucking factors?"

But what I realized is that my mindset is all about pleasure and how things affect me—instead of a mindset fixed on God's perfect plan for my life and doing His will, no matter how unpleasant it may seem.

I spend too much time looking around and comparing my lot in life with other Christian women I know.  "What about her, Lord?  It's easy for her to be joyful because her husband is like this and her children are like that." 

We can debate about what 'her' life really might be like behind closed doors... but whether or not my observation is true, I need to focus on God's plan for my life—run the race that God has set before me. (Hebrews 12:1)

Do you think it was easy for Corrie ten Boom to be joyful in the concentration camps? Her positive perspective was a choice, based on her trust in Jesus.   Her joy wasn't in her circumstances, but that she had a loving Savior and that her name was written in heaven! (Luke 10:20)

God has a specific purpose and plan for my life.  I have the opportunity to impact the people around me by how I choose to respond to it.  My glum or joy-filled response affects my husband, my children, my friends, and even unknown onlookers.

When the circumstances of my life seem unpleasant, will I choose to look to God for guidance and comfort, trusting in His Word and His ways?  Or will I wallow and grumble about how it's all my fault—or someone else's fault—and obsess about how different choices might have made my life easier??

We are confident that God is able to orchestrate everything to work toward something good and beautiful when we love Him and accept His invitation to live according to His plan. (Romans 8:28, VOICE)

God can take something that appears unpleasant, or even unbearable, and turn it into something life-changingly beautiful!  We need to trust in His goodness and His love!

Stop the negative thoughts!

I strongly believe that one of the biggest/worst ways a woman can "tear her house down with her own hands" (Proverbs 14:1) is through her thought-life.  Dwelling on negative thoughts is acidic, and it will rob your joy and destroy your view of your husband, your children, and more.  (Trust me, I know this from experience.)

It is so much better to take our negative thoughts captive and replace them with God's life-giving truths!

Here is a snippit on this topic from a three-part series called "Are They Fighting?" from the Titus 2 blog, written by Teri Maxwell.*

>> What you do with your thoughts can make all the difference in your responses to your children when they are not being nice to each other. Second Corinthians 10:5 tells us to take our thoughts captive and bring them into the obedience of Christ.

That means you can think, “I hate it when my children fight with each other. They know better. I am sick and tired of having to deal with them time after time, day after day.” Or you can think, “Lord Jesus, I am so blessed to be the mother of these children. Thank You for entrusting them to me. Help me, Lord, to direct their thoughts and their behavior to express the love You want them to have for each other. Lord Jesus, I know You are working in their lives, and You are working in my life. Thank You, thank You, thank You, Jesus.”

Which thoughts do you believe will help you have a patient and loving attitude toward your children when you correct them for wrong behavior? Which thoughts will give you stamina and determination to be consistent in working with your children? Which thoughts will allow you to put a smile on your face and move on with your day positively after a situation with the children?

I can attest to having done it both ways, and I was way more successful and way happier with myself when I took the route of the second set of thoughts. The first set hurtled me into a pit of self-pity from which it was almost impossible to climb out. The second set put my mind on the Lord Jesus, the gratitude He tells me to have, and the possibility of a brighter future. <<

* Teri Maxwell is the mother of eight children, grandma of seven, and she began homeschooling in 1985. All of her children have graduated from homeschool, and three are married. Teri is blessed to be able to share her heart at homeschool conferences and has been writing monthly articles of encouragement for moms since 1990.

Life is hard, but God is good.

When I think too much about what I perceive are my life's hardships [i.e. become too introspective] this is where my thoughts go:

Why is this so hard? 

What did I do to deserve this? 

If I had made this choice differently x number of years ago, would I have avoided this hardship today? 

If I dwell in that place too long, it is damaging to my joy.

Well, here is a thought-provoking excerpt from a blog called Compared to Who? written by a Christian gal named Heather Creekmore. This is from her post, What Do You Do When it Hurts?

I love the Olympics. I am amazed by the participants. Watching the gymnasts, swimmers, divers, runners, rowers, and athletic powerhouses in every category of competition is impressive. It’s thrilling to see them make it to this moment and, in many cases, to watch them win.

But, I wonder. Could they have ever made it to that medal stand without pain? If they had trained “hurt free” for decades, would they have ever had the opportunity to compete for gold? How many times did those gymnasts fall from the uneven bars? How many years did those swimmers’ arms’ ache after nine hours of training in the pool? How many missed twists off the 10 meter caused a sting to the diver’s body? How many times have these athletes been treated for torn ligaments, strained muscles, or even broken bones? How many times has it hurt SO bad that they questioned whether or not they should continue?

My thought for the day is that working out, if done well, is not pain-free. If you want to succeed as an athlete. There will be pain.

Same with life. Somewhere, somehow, we got the impression that because we are Americans life will be pain free. As Christians we take that one step further, believing that because we have God on our side we are even more immunized from hurt. If it makes you say “ouch” we quickly search for an escape. We assume we should be able to get away because, surely, that’s not what God has for us. We “claim” the Bible verses that speak to God’s protection as our shields against enduring hardships. We ignore the verses that promise things like, “we will be persecuted” (John 15:18-21) or you, “will have trouble” (John 16:33). Even the oft-quoted 23rd Psalm mentions going through the “valley of the shadow of death.”

What we miss is that the promise is that God is with us through the hurt. It is not that life will be pain-free. The promise is that He will never leave us, nor forsake us. (Hebrews 13:5) That He will be with us as we walk through that dark, dark valley. (Psalm 23:4) The promise is that we have no reason to fear because we know God is in control.

I'll be honest.  I want my life to be pain-free. Without annoyances.  No inconveniences. Where everything goes my way.  And since it's summertime, I'll say I'm tired of pulling weeds! both literally and proverbially.  *wink*

But Heather Creekmore is right—do I/we ignore the Bible verses that indicate we will have troubles in this life?  In fact, 1 Peter 4:12 says, "Dear friends, don't be surprised at the fiery trials you are going through, as if something strange were happening to you."  (That whole chapter gives excellent perspective and encouragement, by the way!)

But she is also right as she points out where our hope needs to lie: in God's promises (especially the ones in bold print above).  He will not leave us!  I love John 16:33—"In this world you will have trouble, but take heart for I have overcome the world!"  Our Savior, Jesus, cares for us—and He wins the battle in the end—and you can take heart in that! :)

(There's also the aspect that troubles and trials build character— halleluiah! our trials are not wasted!— and for that, I call God the Great Recycler!  But that's another post....)

Thinking long-range...

" In our hurry to solve the crisis of the hour, we often fail to consider the long-range consequences of our short-term solutions."

-Liz Curtis Higgs

We're a work in progress

This is my new mantra:  We're a work in progress.

It is SO much easier to handle the day-to-day stresses involved in child-rearing when you realize and accept that you cannot control the outcome, but you can trust God to work all things together for the good of those who love Him (Romans 8:28)!

I am reminded of Philippians 1:6... The One who has begun His good work in you will go on developing it until the day of Jesus Christ.  (Phillips)  We all make mistakes. Sometimes intentionally.  [Gasp!]  But we are a "work in progress" which God is developing... molding... shaping... continually refining... until Jesus returns!  We won't "arrive" at perfection here on this earth.  Perfection is really not the focus—growth is.

I also think of Philippians 2:13... For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases Him. (NLT)  Have you ever felt disappointed in your behavior?  Guess what?  It is GOD who has given you the desire to please Him!  He also doesn't give us an impossible task—He will give us the power to do what pleases Him too.

Ahhh.  Proper perspective makes such a difference!

Daily connection!

When a believer does not depend on God to meet his daily needs, his love for God grows cold.  This is why we should read our Bibles and connect with God every day!!

"Right" with Him because of what HE did

I've been exchanging comments on someone else's blog, and it's got me thinking more deeply about my "performance" as a Christ-follower and God's grace.  One blogger wrote:

>> Legalism robs us of joy, but it does give us a sense of security; it is scary when that security is pulled out from under us…but it forces us out of our comfort zone and to find that security in Christ alone.<<

So I started thinking... Legalism does give a sort of warped sense of security—we think if we just follow this list of rules, we're good to go!  But once we start trying to follow a list of "rules" we realize it's unachievable (that's what happened to me)—which robs your joy—and is not God's plan!

Perhaps that's why things go the way they do in life... why X plus Y often doesn't equal Z.  Because God wants us to rely on HIM in everything, not a [predictable?] list of rules.  I think God is happier when we rely on Him—for direction AND for His grace to cover our messes!—than when we strive to do everything "perfectly" or "the right way" (whatever we perceive that to be!).

That's where the freedom is: knowing we are SECURE IN CHRIST right in the midst of our messes—because He chose to lay down His life to pay the penalty for our sins—not secure with Him because of our "good deeds."

That's my big thing right now: trying to grasp that my "rightness" with God is because of what HE did, not because of anything I have done!  (The moment I start thinking I'm a "good Christian" I am already counting on my good deeds!)

I'm so thankful for God's patience and His grace!!!

Comfort... my arch nemesis...

Comfort.  I value comfort more than I often realize.  (I'll bet most of us do.)  Do I value living for Jesus more than comfort?  Am I willing to make sacrifices of my precious time, my money, my preferences, or even my rights... for His glory?  Am I willing to step out where He's leading?  Would I be to set aside the things I love which bring me comfort (think: coffee, computer time, or whatever) for His greater purposes??  Not saying those things are bad... just interesting to examine whether I'd even be willing to set them aside if He asked me to.

Here's a little snippit from the  Focus on the Family broadcast on 4/3/14.

Jim Daly: People tend to, in my observation, we lean toward comfort. That's the human nature. Even in a Christian context. We want life to be comfortable. We pray for life to be comfortable!  Is that right or wrong?

Dr. Arnie Cole:  I'm not saying whether it's right or wrong, I'm saying yes, you're reading a trend very clearly. To me, as a Christ follower, I look for people who want to "win the day" spiritually, if you will. ...  A lot of people define comfort as winning the day spiritually. But I'm looking at what makes a difference in your spiritual life. And oftentimes comfort is problematic for people.

Something to think about!!

Is humanism creeping into your worldview?

I was recently reading a post from a very inspiring, convicting blog when I came across this thought:

Humanism is the belief that all things exist for man’s good and betterment, and therefore man determines right and wrong; Christianity is the belief that man exists for God, and as such, He knows what is best for us...  The two [sets of beliefs] are antagonistic in nature.  But there is a MAJOR problem…many Christians have unknowingly begun to follow the doctrine of humanism, wounding the body of Christ, rendering themselves impotent—and even worse—accomplice to man’s destruction.

I have been thinking about this off and on for several weeks.  What is our purpose for life on this earth?  What are we really living for?  I would guess that the majority of us (myself included) would indicate that we want—and perhaps even expect—a life that is "good" (according to our own standards) and nice and fun, and definitely without significant hardship.  And when hardship, suffering, illness, or just plain old unpleasantness touch or begin to permeate our lives, we (in our human condition) often feel shocked, dismayed, or even angry.  And we start thinking things like,
- why is God doing this to me?
- what did I do to deserve this?

And that is the very spot where we need to take a few steps back and think about our expectations for life.  Who are we living for?  As stated above, Christianity is the belief that man exists for God and that He knows what is best for us.  Do we trust Him??  Do we trust {a} that He is good and {b} that He loves us and {c} that He has the best plans for our lives?

All three of those points are the unwavering Truth!  If we, as believers and disciples of Jesus, are having trouble taking that in, we need to dig into God's Word to find the truth for ourselves and embrace it!  (See the verse references below to get you started.) 

That concept—that we exist for God, not for our own good and betterment—has huge implications for how we think (the filter we use as we process life's happenings) and the decisions we make.  In order to survive and thrive, we absolutely must understand that God is good, all the time, and that the way He deals with us is always through the filter of His love.  (If you want to discuss this further, please get in touch via the comments! I would love to connect with you!)

{a} Psalm 119:68, Psalm 107:1
{b} John 3:16, Romans 5:8
{c} Jeremiah 29:11, Psalm 32:8, Romans 8:28-29

Have you heard of SOAPing?

I recently read a book called, The Divine Mentor by Wayne Cordeiro.  The points in this book have the potential to change the way you personally hear from God through His Word, the Bible!

Mr. Cordeiro explains that God put the Bible together to instruct us, to help us, and to encourage us.

"For whatever was written in earlier times was written for our instruction, so that through perseverance and the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope." - Romans 15:4

Expounding on this verse, he also suggests that as we read, we can consider the authors of each book of the Bible as "divine mentors"—ones whom God picked to teach us.

What Mr. Cordeiro recommends is reading a selected chunk of Scripture (perhaps one chapter or a section of a chapter—having a reading plan is helpful)... taking time to chew on it and consider it.  Then you take a verse that stuck out to you and write about it in a journal.  He came up with a method of journaling he calls SOAP (S- Scripture, O- Observation, A-Application, P- Prayer).  Read the book to learn more about it!

While to some it might sound like a lot of work, especially to a person who perhaps has never done any journaling—or doesn't care for it much—I can testify that God has a way of speaking to a person's heart through this method... insights you've never noticed before!

I plan to post a few of my journal entries... hopefully as an encouragement to anyone who may be reading this blog.  My life experience has shown me that hope is only found in the Lord, and I want to pass that on!

Follow Jesus

"My fear is that there are a lot of people in the Church following the rules, but not really following Jesus."

"I think that most people in most churches think that they're following Jesus—and it's well intentioned—but the reality is, they have invited Jesus to follow them. And that's a whole different thing."

"The Gospel cost [us] nothing, but it demands everything. Too often we want what God is offering, but we don't want to give anything up in return. And that's where we miss out. I'm afraid that some people feel like, 'Well, if I don't hold out a little bit, I'm going to miss out on what life may have to offer.'  But the reality is, when you hold out on God you're missing out on everything that He wants to do in you and through you."

~ Mark Batterson on Focus on the Family
(broadcast on 10/15/13)

 

Love one another

God just showed me something this morning. It's about how we regard other drivers and what's really going on in our hearts.

So I'm coming down the freeway and this Chrysler is entering reeeeeally slowly... probably 20 mph slower than the flow of traffic.  Slightly annoyed, I mutter under my breath, "Come on, dude!" 

But what am I REALLY saying?

What I'm really saying is, "I am going somewhere and you're in my way! You're slowing me down!  Move it!"  And it struck me how utterly SELFISH that is!

What does Jesus say about dealing with people?  "Love one another" and "Be patient with one another, bearing with each other in love" and "Forgive one another, just as I have forgiven you!"  (John 13:34, Eph 4:2, Col 3:13)

Whether the guy is 90 years old or not from around these parts, no matter what the reason, we are to be patient and loving toward one another!

I love how the Lord gently convicts. :)

Obedience

In the old way, obedience was an obligation to keep the rules. In the new way, it is an opportunity to be exactly what you were created to be.

-Ethan Formo

Pursuing what matters

Pursue righteousness and you'll gain happiness.
Pursue happiness and you'll miss both.

(Posted by a friend on Facebook today.)

Choose

"Everyone must choose one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret."

- Jim Rohn

God's strength demonstrated by His forgiveness

Somehow I was able to rouse myself out of bed and go for a walk this morning at 6:30.  (Keep in mind, in Minnesota it's still below freezing in the morning.)  But what a glorious morning... crisp air, clear sky, the sun not quite at the horizon, and the cardinals calling to each other... a great way to start the day!

On my walk I was thinking about God and how good He is... how much He loved us, that He sent His Son—Jesus—to pay the penalty for our sins (He never sinned!) by dying on the cross WHILE we were still sinners [see Romans 5:8].  What other god would do that?!

You see, that's where God really displays His power.  Any other god would pulverize a wrong-doer.  Not our God—He shows His great strength in forgiving those who've done wrong!

I can't figure out where the image of God got distorted along the way—how did God come to be portrayed as this Big Drill Sergent in the Sky, just waiting for humans to screw up so He could hurl lightning bolts down on them?

The God of the Bible is a loving God!  And here's how we know.  The truth is, we have all wronged Him...

For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard. (Romans 3:23, NLT)

But God made a way for us to be "made right" with Him...

The payment for sin is death, but the gift that God freely gives is everlasting life found in Christ Jesus our Lord.  (Romans 6:23, GW)

That's great news!  But it's not enough to just acknowledge that Jesus lived...

You believe there is one God. That’s good, but even the demons believe that! And they shake with fear.  (James 2:19, ERV)

...we need to place our faith in Him:

 

If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is by believing in your heart that you are made right with God, and it is by confessing with your mouth that you are saved ... For "Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved."  (Romans 10:9, 10, 13, NLT)

We do that by acknowledging (through prayer—just talking to God!) that we are sinners and that we deserve death, but believing that Jesus died on the cross to save us from the penalty of our sin, and then receiving His free gift of salvation!

But to all who believed him and accepted him, he gave the right to become children of God. (John 1:12, NLT)

From there we turn away from our old life of sin to a new life in Christ:

Now we look inside, and what we see is that anyone united with the Messiah gets a fresh start, is created new. The old life is gone; a new life burgeons! (2 Corinthians 5:17, MSG)

When we trust Jesus to save us, this makes us God's children!  And He was glad to adopt us!!

God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure. (Ephesians 1:5, NLT)

All of this is what gives my life meaning and purpose.  The God who made heaven and earth LOVES YOU and ME—and He wants to be near us!  But He is a gentleman—He won't force Himself on anyone... He will only come when we invite Him.

Won't you call on Him today?  He'd love to hear from you...

Clinging to earthly pleasures

"Remember what I say: if you would cleave to earthly pleasures, these are the things which murder souls. There is no surer way to get a seared conscience and a hard impenitent heart, than to give way to the desires of the flesh and mind. It seems nothing at first, but it tells in the long run.

"Consider what Peter says: 'abstain from fleshly lusts, which war against the soul' (1 Peter 2:11). They destroy the soul's peace, break down its strength, lead it in to hard captivity, make it a slave."

~ J. C. Ryle (1816-1900)

When I read this, I thought about my computer usage. Not "bad stuff" but just a lot of time wasters...  a lot... and it can feel addictive at times.  Earthly pleasures... these are the things which murder souls...

To be fully committed: keep watch and pray

"If you want to be My disciple, you must hate everyone else by comparison—your father and mother, [spouse] and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even your own life."
-Luke 14:26

Jesus was quite popular and had a large crowd of people following Him around.  I'm sure some people were sort of "star struck" and proclaimed they'd follow Him to the ends of the earth. (Even Peter said he'd be willing to die with Jesus.)  But Jesus knew that fair-weather, half-hearted disciples would be ineffective—so He made it clear that His true followers would need to be so committed to Him, it would appear as though they hated everyone and everything else in comparison.

What caught my eye about the verse above was the "even your own life" part. As I take a few moments to ponder it, I see I spend a fair amount of time/effort trying to make my life as comfortable and enjoyable as possible. I recognize this because of the displeasure I feel when my life seems "too hard" (hah! seriously?!), too unpleasant from dealing with whining/arguing children, and full of thoughts of "when can I get some me-time" to read, exercise, be on the computer, veg in front of a movie, etc.  And this is often. When I am so consumed with what I perceive are "my needs", how can I really be sold out for the Lord?

I am reminded of Matthew 26:41 where Jesus says, "Keep watch and pray, so that you will not give in to temptation. For the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak."  In my heart of hearts (my spirit), it is Jesus I desire more than anything else!  Nothing is worth living for besides Him!  But I am self-centered and weak (my flesh). I want extended amounts of leisure and pleasure, and no harassment.  This is not reality for a follower of Christ.  Not that it's all drudgery! But it is hard work, and it takes perseverance and perspective.  Jesus said, "If any of you wants to be My follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow Me. If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for My sake, you will find true life" (Luke 9:23-24).

So, the antidote for a half-hearted pursuit of Him and the temptation to create (and worship) a comfortable life: keep watch [keep eyes on Him] and pray!

Do it now

The new year is in full swing.  Seems like the perfect time to start new habits.  And so we ponder and daydream of what we'd like to change.  But you know, I think we tend to exalt the dream more than taking action!

Action always generates inspiration.
Inspiration seldom generates action.
- Frank Tibolt

Reminds me of another cute little quote I came across several years ago: "Whenever I feel like exercise, I lie down until the feeling passes" (Robert M. Hutches).  Funny!.... and oh so true.

You want to get in better shape?  Go for a walk—now—instead of having a snack.  You want to be closer to God?  Get into the Word—now—instead of checking Facebook.

Don't wait to feel motivated.  Just do it—right now! 

And, yeah... as I sit here and write, my 5-year-old comes upstairs to inform me that he "lost" his bouncy ball in the treadmill.  Yes, in the treadmill.  The very treadmill that the boys are not supposed to touch.  I can hear it rolling around in there when I lift the plank.  Great.  So much for exercise in the winter.  Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr..........

You want to vent less anger?  (I do.)  Take a deep breath—NOW—instead of verbally puking all over everyone.  You want to be more joy-filled?  (I do.)  Instead of complaining, thank God for your blessings—now.

Just do it.  Action generates inspiration.